One of the most shocking and saddening parts of hurricane Ike and it's aftermath are the stories coming out about the people who tried to weather the storm in places like Galveston--and chose to do so with their children.
Now I'm all for population control through stupidity, so I think it's awesome that some people decided to stay behind in places that officials knew would be hit hard. I think it's great that some people chose to ignore warnings and put themselves in the path of a huge, life threatening storm. Some people just deserve to die and in situations like this, they prove that not only are they not sane, productive members of society, but that it's really best to remove them from the breeding population thereby increasing the average intelligent quotient.
The problem is that a lot of these fucktards have already bred and passed on their stupid-genes to innocent kids who, unlike their parents, do not deserve to die. So when stories trickle out of the areas hit by the hurricane about parents using permanent marker to write their kids names and social security numbers on their arms so that their bodies could be identified if they were killed is absolutely appaling.
As a parent, what do you tell your child as you're writing on their arm? Authorities come by and plead with you to leave, they tell you that you are risking death. It's on the news. Every channel offers dire predictions for the catastrophe about to occur. Children are perceptive. They know what's coming and they know it's dangerous, no matter how much you may feel you've "protected" them from the gravity of the situation.
They see the policemen that you've taught them to trust come knocking on your door. They hear them yelling at you, telling you to leave--leave at once! You ignore them. To placate them, you take the marker they offer and scribble your name on your arm along with your SSN. Then you turn to your child, your frightened, innocent child and you mark their arm as well.
What do you say to this child? You are marking their body for identification after death. You are, whether you realize it or not, telling this child that he or she may die. That child removes the "may" from that equation and decides that they will, in fact, die.
Being a fool is not a crime. Those who ignored warnings, stayed behind and were killed took their chances and got their due. I just can't understand how a parent could be so selfish as to allow a child to stay behind with them? What possible reason could you have for subjecting a child to this? With Katrina as such a fresh example of the power of hurricanes and the deaths they can cause, how can you risk the life of a child--your child?
It's unthinkable that there are people out there who can be so foolish. Sadly though, its what some parts of our society have become. And sadly, it's what will be passed on.
Showing posts with label hurricane. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hurricane. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Blow me!
What’s the deal with these hurricane names anyway? Who is the lucky guy who gets paid a government salary to think up the names for the hurricanes every year and why can’t that person do a better job of it?
The names for 2008 hurricanes are as follows: Arthur, Bertha, Cristobal, Dolly, Edouard, Fay, Gustav, Hanna, Ike, Josephine, Kyle, Laura, Marco, Nana, Omar, Paloma, Rene, Sally, Teddy, Vicky and Wilfred.
We’re currently on Fay. Yes, Fay. Fearsome, devastating, earth shattering, catastrophic, frightening Fay.
A hurricane is one of the most awesome and terrifying forces of nature and the best they could do was to name it after someone’s grandmother? Fay isn’t even remotely frightening! In fact, the whole list is full of a bunch of sissy-sally names, including, of course, Sally herowndamnself! In fact, the entire list has only one scary name on it and that of course Ike, who invokes the badass motherfuckery of Ike Turner.
I guarantee some coastline is going to get bitch slapped by old Ike! But Kyle? The name Kyle inspires about as much fear as a Playboy bunny pillowfight! Hanna? Is it a stripper or a hurricane? Or is the connection supposed to be that either way you get blown?
Rene? The French Hurricane? That sumbitch is going to surrender LONG before it gets anywhere close to land!
No, I’m afraid that whomever is in charge of naming hurricanes is doing a piss poor job, which is why I think they should hire me. I would name hurricanes in a way that would properly scare the crap out of people. If I was in charge of naming them, people wouldn’t be sticking around to see if they could ride it out! You can bet that when the talking head come onto your nightly news warning you about Hurricane Fuck You Up The Ass With A Splintery Wooden Phone Pole, that you’re going to go ahead and take some damn cover!
When Hurricane Darth Vader comes to town, you can expect to be taken over by the Dark Side! When Hurricane Samuel L. Jackson hits land, you can bet that motherfucker is going to be one motherfuckin motherfucker of a motherfucking hurricane!
Hurricane Hemorrhoid will guarantee you a burning pain in the ass that just won’t seem to ever go away! Hurricane George W. Bush will last forever and leave us all up shit’s creek. Hurricane Hitler will take out the entire East Coast! Hurricane Travolta will suck all the joy from your life for two hours and leave you $10.00 less rich and having a bad case of the popcorn shits!
The point is that I can name me some hurricanes! I’m not messing around here! There will be no Nana’s or Omar’s on my watch. A hurricane is a terrifying force of nature and they should be named accordingly. At the rate we’re going here, next years names may very well be stripper themed and our cities will be wiped out by the likes of Bambi, Crystal, Portia and Roxanne!
It’s flat out embarrassing to have to say that you got beat up by someone with a sissy name. You never want to have to respond to the question, “Oh my God! What happened to you????” with an answer of, “I got knocked out by Fay.”
Fay isn’t just a girl, she’s someone’s grandma. She bakes cookies and smiles at you through crooked dentures. Fay hasn’t blown a damn thing since the 50’s. She’s not a hurricane, she’s a rainbow.
Maybe the person in charge of naming hurricanes can be reassigned to rainbow naming. In the mean time, write your local congressman and nominate me to head up the Department of Hurricane Naming and never be embarrassed by a wimpy named hurricane kicking your ass again!
(a special thanks to Jay for the idea for this entry!)
The names for 2008 hurricanes are as follows: Arthur, Bertha, Cristobal, Dolly, Edouard, Fay, Gustav, Hanna, Ike, Josephine, Kyle, Laura, Marco, Nana, Omar, Paloma, Rene, Sally, Teddy, Vicky and Wilfred.
We’re currently on Fay. Yes, Fay. Fearsome, devastating, earth shattering, catastrophic, frightening Fay.
A hurricane is one of the most awesome and terrifying forces of nature and the best they could do was to name it after someone’s grandmother? Fay isn’t even remotely frightening! In fact, the whole list is full of a bunch of sissy-sally names, including, of course, Sally herowndamnself! In fact, the entire list has only one scary name on it and that of course Ike, who invokes the badass motherfuckery of Ike Turner.
I guarantee some coastline is going to get bitch slapped by old Ike! But Kyle? The name Kyle inspires about as much fear as a Playboy bunny pillowfight! Hanna? Is it a stripper or a hurricane? Or is the connection supposed to be that either way you get blown?
Rene? The French Hurricane? That sumbitch is going to surrender LONG before it gets anywhere close to land!
No, I’m afraid that whomever is in charge of naming hurricanes is doing a piss poor job, which is why I think they should hire me. I would name hurricanes in a way that would properly scare the crap out of people. If I was in charge of naming them, people wouldn’t be sticking around to see if they could ride it out! You can bet that when the talking head come onto your nightly news warning you about Hurricane Fuck You Up The Ass With A Splintery Wooden Phone Pole, that you’re going to go ahead and take some damn cover!
When Hurricane Darth Vader comes to town, you can expect to be taken over by the Dark Side! When Hurricane Samuel L. Jackson hits land, you can bet that motherfucker is going to be one motherfuckin motherfucker of a motherfucking hurricane!
Hurricane Hemorrhoid will guarantee you a burning pain in the ass that just won’t seem to ever go away! Hurricane George W. Bush will last forever and leave us all up shit’s creek. Hurricane Hitler will take out the entire East Coast! Hurricane Travolta will suck all the joy from your life for two hours and leave you $10.00 less rich and having a bad case of the popcorn shits!
The point is that I can name me some hurricanes! I’m not messing around here! There will be no Nana’s or Omar’s on my watch. A hurricane is a terrifying force of nature and they should be named accordingly. At the rate we’re going here, next years names may very well be stripper themed and our cities will be wiped out by the likes of Bambi, Crystal, Portia and Roxanne!
It’s flat out embarrassing to have to say that you got beat up by someone with a sissy name. You never want to have to respond to the question, “Oh my God! What happened to you????” with an answer of, “I got knocked out by Fay.”
Fay isn’t just a girl, she’s someone’s grandma. She bakes cookies and smiles at you through crooked dentures. Fay hasn’t blown a damn thing since the 50’s. She’s not a hurricane, she’s a rainbow.
Maybe the person in charge of naming hurricanes can be reassigned to rainbow naming. In the mean time, write your local congressman and nominate me to head up the Department of Hurricane Naming and never be embarrassed by a wimpy named hurricane kicking your ass again!
(a special thanks to Jay for the idea for this entry!)
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